RAGBRAI XXXV Quotes:

Yeah, I'm on "the ragbrai"!! ~Stantastic

Wash my car fuckchop!! Get a job fuckchop!! ~Andy to an 8 year old girl

I'm not having any fun!! ~Pam's meltdown the first night out

I got old man tongue in my mouth. ~Pam

I like to dance?... A LOT ~Andy K.

I was really hungry. ~Pam, explaining her meltdown the next day

If anyone asks me to dance today, I'm going to tell them to FUCK OFF. ~Andy K.

Hey, we got a new guy on our team who's looking for another team to ride with. ~The Todd

Your bird doesn't fly. ~The Todd to Emu Shawn

Jenny Reagan!

But they were female goats, `cause you know, he's not gay. ~The Todd, telling a story about one of their newbies

Do you have any Magnum in there? ~Stantastic

No seriously, how tall ARE you?? ~Jeanne to Stantastic

Hypothetically, you wake up and your light batteries are dead, you look up the road, you look down the road, you pick a direction & start biking & 25 miles later you run into a lake and sleep on a picnic table... hypothetically. ~Billy Buzz

Stan-tastic!!! ~Beth

Oh, that was acid by the way. ~The Todd

Wine and cheese party, 5 miles!! ~The Bloody Choads

Do you guys have any pot? ~Wes MF Briggs at about 3:30am

Weren't those the clothes you were wearing yesterday?? ~Our newbies to us

Good God, how many teams' bitch are you?? ~Newbie

You mean you're not collecting these for kids with cancer?? ~Newbie when he realized why I was collecting tabs on my carabineer

See you in the morning!! ~Pam to newbies

Here, take these... ~Stantastic

My red eye girls!! ~Jarcho

Mmmmmm... army guys are HOT! ~Newly outed Jace

You girls always smell so good. ~Jerome

How come Mike's fiance can smell so good and we don't?? ~Pam to Beth

Where's Beth? ~Pam

You're a phony Jew!! ~Beth to Pam

Someone smells. ~Newbie while we posed for our team pic

She was so hot, I could really get into trouble. ~Wilson

What about ragbrai doesn't scream honeymoon?? ~Beth

We have one more cheeseball!! ~ Shawn to the townies who wanted us to leave

I'm so glad we can openly talk about how much we hate Sprouse now. ~Shawn to Beth and Pam

God bless America. ~Lance Armstrong

We're turning it up to 11 now. ~Shawn

Who do you girls think you are? Fun. ~Nick C. to Beth and Pam. Pam's response

I have to call my wife... Yesssss! No bars! ~Andy K.

Fucking unicorns. ~Cory

These shorts are from Target!! ~Pam's angry retort to the wrong question... again

Drop it like it's hot. ~Beth

Who brought the witch hazel?? ~The Todd

C'mon Tyson... hurry up!! ~The Bloody Choads to their dead chicken

We could've had a pet turkey today. ~Stantastic

You WOULD like this song Shawn! ~Jeanne

I'm not going to go very faaaaaaa!!!!! ~Pam falling down a ravine

We're good, we're good, let's ride! ~Wilson after stepping on their tandem, rendering it unridable

Where's Shawn?? ~ Beth

The SAG still picked you up even though you don't have a bracelet? ~Newbie

Designer socks and Nike shocks, that's just how I roll. ~Jarcho, passed to Stantastic about Beth

Maybe we'll have a threesome, hold on, let me look at your faces. ~Stantastic to Beth and Pam

I wish the toilet had had handlebars. ~Andy K.

So you a Hawkeye fan? ~Pam to ultra Hawkeye attired newbie

If you love it, throw it out the window. ~Matt O.

*chirp, chirp, chirp* ~Shawn

So which Emu are you married to? ~Stantastic to Beth

Turn those lights off!! They're gonna give me a seizure!!! ~Pam during her meltdown

You're only about 30 miles out. ~Sag to Stantastic on the ride out

I'd like to lick your bellybutton from the inside. ~60 year old townie to Pam in Melvin

No, we're not in the Army; we don't know what our shirts mean. ~Pam and Beth all day with our FTA shirts

Oh don't worry, that's just our drive.r ~Mosquitoes about the guy passed out on the side of the road

You're gonna choose this to get mad about?! ~Shawn, quoting a naked Lon

I think I got mothball poisoning. ~Stantastic about the $22.50 motel
he stayed in on the ride out

Do it. ~Beth, while Pam tried to roll over

But Pam, he still lives on a bus by the river. Yesss, you make a good point. ~Beth to Pam trying to get over Googley Nick

I gave him some of my granola, but he wasn't hungry. ~Stantastic, about the dead mouse in their Suburban

We can hear you braking!!! ~Pam and Beth to the Bloody Choads riding behind them

Do you smell that?!?!? *arms flailing* ~Beth passing a pungent hog farm on the way down

You can always get a divorce... worked for me! ~Lon

Brokeback RAGBRAI

The good news is you've gone 40 miles; the bad news is you have 43 more to go. ~Bartender

The cheese is like molten lava! ~Kizzier's comment to us w/ every pizza

I know how the system works, you order your pizza and in 3 hours you'll get it, trust me, I know the system. ~Andy K